For years, the leadership speech for women has been shaped by one idea: to be taken seriously, we must emulate the powerful male
archetype—assertive, outspoken, extraverted. I lived that story in my 20s and 30s—I wore serious pantsuits, looked people straight in the eye, used humor to defuse tension, just like men do. I thought they’ll listen. It worked. I climbed the corporate career ladder, earned respect, and built a career. But something shifted in my late 30s and 40s. Motherhood cracked open a new dimension in me—I started to question the value of achievement, material things, and speed over safety, long-term responsibility, and quiet determination.
Perhaps there is a difference between women as leaders and mothers as leaders.
And it’s time we name it.
Mothers tap into a unique pool of feminine intuition and wisdom that comes from the need to protect the vulnerable. They are not all “Mother Theresa” types, of course. Some are more like Queen Consort Catherine de Medici of France, who made three of her sons kings and ultimately sacrificed the family for royal longevity—strategic, visionary, and sometimes ruthless. Mother-leaders don’t need a throne or a title to shape the future and do the right thing—they act when the situation calls for it.
In recent years, diversity policies have encouraged the rise of women leaders who embody “yang” traits—bold, visible, and vocal. That’s progress. But let’s not overlook the quiet power of mother-leaders who get things done through others, who build trust, who listen deeply, and who lead with love. They are not Napoleons, conquering new lands. Mothers are gardeners of human potential.
I see them every day. Elena and Saule, my Toastmasters club colleagues, are shining examples. They “mothered” a Gavel public speaking club for children. Their impact is tremendous. They do more and talk less. They smile, guide, and empower. They even make us look good in pictures. That’s what mother-leaders do. They face sleepless nights, emotional storms, and the weight of responsibility—and still show up with grace. They are determined. They know that true leadership is not about being in charge, but about caring deeply and acting wisely.
So I ask you, dear reader:
🌱 Do you have examples of mother-leaders around you at work?
🌱 Who are they, and what impact do they have on the people around them?
🌱 Do you recognize the mother-leader traits in yourself?
Let’s expand our definition of leadership. It’s time to unveil the quiet, strategic, nurturing force that mother-leaders bring to the table.
Let’s make space for leaders who build legacies not through domination, but through devotion and commitment.
How can you embrace your inner mother-leader?
- 💖 Truly know yourself and truly love yourself—acknowledge your strengths, vulnerabilities, and biases.
- 🌍 Explore the universe around you, beyond your family—your ideas matter.
- 🌸 Blossom and share your ideas with enthusiasm—don’t wait for permission.
- 🤝 Help and receive help—leadership is not a solo act.
- 🌟 Believe in yourself—never use negative words about yourself. Don’t apologize for your influence. Your voice is powerful.
Leadership starts with you.
Invest in your happiness and your dreams. Whether you’re a mother by birth, by spirit, or by action, your leadership leaves a lasting imprint. Let’s recognize it.
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About the Author:
Steliana van de Rijt-Economu is a leadership (team) coach, global speaker, and author of the best-selling books “Parentship: A Leadership Guide for Families and Teams” and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. She is the founder of “Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders”, Linkedin community, a place dedicated to empowering working parents—especially women—to lead with purpose both at home and in the workplace