by mothersasleaders | Mar 31, 2026 | A mother's inner world of emotions and feelings
A few weeks ago, a friend shared a breakthrough. He had finally resolved a three‑year communication “glitch” with an important person in his life. The solution wasn’t a complex negotiation. It was simpler—and much harder: he let go of the need to be right. Instead, he showed commitment to the relationship by simply showing up.
Trust, Empathy, and the Bravery to Let Go of Ego
These three themes followed me throughout the month of March. During my first IWD (International Women’s Day) interview on March 1st, 14‑year‑old Kara spoke about empathy as a “cure” for world leaders. Jennifer Hughes, our public‑relations expert, explored the connection between trust and transparency. And finally, our poet and artist Wen Lozano reflected on the quiet bravery required to stay calm when the ground is shifting.
Despite their different backgrounds, all seven women leaders I interviewed kept returning to the same core messages. Intellectually, I understood the point.
As a Systemic Team Coach and Rice University Mentor Coach, I talk about this constantly with our coaches and students. I know that “being right” is often the enemy of “being effective”—and, more often than not, the enemy of “being loved.”
But as life tends to do, the universe decided I needed a practical exam… or let’s call it a “school field day.”
The Kitchen Reality
During my trip to Romania, I hit a wall in a personal relationship. My affection and sense of justice clouded my judgment, and I stepped in to “save” someone who didn’t actually need saving. I slipped out of my coaching presence and into a rescuer role. The result? A mess that still hasn’t been cleaned up.
Today—ten days later—the realization finally landed: I didn’t have to intervene. Even if I was right, I needed to trust the system and trust them to be brave.
Sometimes we need a coaching mindset in the kitchen, not only during a formal coaching session. And other times, we need to bring the same commitment, trust, and passion we invest in our kitchen conversations into our boardrooms and virtual workshops.
The Learning Point: The Space Between
In my Team Coaching workshop in Romania this month, we worked on creating a “one‑team feeling” between two teams by leveraging self‑awareness, emotional intelligence, and positive intelligence as pathways to building collective trust in their ability to do better together than they do apart.
The biggest hurdle wasn’t the structural merger; it was building the bravery to let go of the “old ego” for the sake of succeeding together.
When we try to “save” our teams—or our family members—we unintentionally strip them of their agency. True systemic and authentic leadership, whether in a billion‑dollar merger or at the kitchen table, requires us to:
- Surrender the need to be right
- Invest the heart—passion and bravery—into the process
- Trust the system to find its own resolution, while accepting our imperfect human nature
As I reflect on this full month of March—from the International Women’s Day stage to the Romanian energy‑sector challenges, all against a backdrop of global political volatility—I am reminded that the “family team” is our most constant laboratory and our deepest source of bravery.
Turning Tables – A Question for You
Where are you trying to “save” someone who doesn’t need saving? And what might happen if, just for this week, you traded your “rightness” for a little more trust—in the universe, in the system, and in yourself.
With humility and respect, Steliana
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About the Author:
I’m Steliana van de Rijt-Economu, founder of ‘Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders’ and author of ‘Parentship’ and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. My mission is to bring shared leadership into families, teams, organizations, and society by empowering the next generation and breaking generational silos.
by mothersasleaders | Feb 27, 2026 | A mother's inner world of emotions and feelings
Every year, International Women’s Day invites us to pause, reflect, and listen. This year, through Mothers as Leaders: Learning Across Borders, I wanted to create something more intimate and more courageous — a space where women across generations, cultures, and life journeys could speak out and stand out.
The result is the IWD 2026 Cross‑Generational Interview Series: eight women, eight stories, eight visions for a better world.
Each conversation is just 20 minutes long, yet each one opens a window into a different way of leading — through healing, through faith, through storytelling, through art, through aspiration, through courage, through community, and through the quiet power of presence.
A Theme That Connects Us All
Every speaker answers the same three questions — a simple framework that reveals extraordinary depth:
- If you had a magic wand, what would you change about the world?
- What would you change about your community?
- What would you change about yourself?
Across continents and generations, these questions remind us that leadership begins with imagination — the courage to envision something better.
Women Who Lead in Their Own Way
Our speakers come from Australia, the Philippines, Mexico, Louisiana, Texas, and beyond. They are mothers, artists, healers, communicators, engineers, poets, and professionals who carry their cultures, their families, and their lived experiences into the way they lead. They show us that leadership is not a title — it is a practice.
A practice of presence.
A practice of courage.
A practice of connection.
Why This Series Matters
As mothers, mentors, and community builders, we often lead quietly — through the stories we tell, the rituals we create, the values we pass on, and the spaces we hold for others. These interviews celebrate that form of leadership: grounded, relational, cross‑generational, and deeply human.
They remind us that when women speak, the world shifts — sometimes loudly, sometimes gently, but always meaningfully.
Join the Conversation
Throughout the first week of March, I invite you to listen, reflect, and share your own aspirations. Let these stories move you, challenge you, and inspire you to imagine the world you want to help create.
Links to our first 3 LinkedIn live events:
Kara van de Rijt (Teen view) – March 1st, 11.30 CST
Cherrie Clark-Moore (The power of Balance) – March 2nd, 12.30 CST
Camille Vaughan (The power of aspiration) – March 2nd, 12.30 CST
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About the Author:
I’m Steliana van de Rijt-Economu, founder of ‘Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders’ and author of ‘Parentship’ and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. My mission is to bring shared leadership into families, teams, organizations, and society by empowering the next generation and breaking generational silos.
by mothersasleaders | Jan 20, 2026 | A mother's inner world of emotions and feelings
Technology and AI continue to reshape the labor market, and frequent job changes have become the norm. While you can’t stop the wheels from spinning, you can pause and ask yourself:
Why am I here? How am I making a difference — for my family, my team, my community?
Almost ten years ago, in 2017, I found myself at a similar crossroads. I wasn’t unhappy, but there was a quiet discomfort. I was good at what I did yet not truly stretched. That’s when I chose to begin my Systemic Team Coaching diploma with the AoEC. For me, impact mattered — and still does. That decision shaped my current career path.
When discomfort whispers, pay attention.
You may be performing well. Your work is solid. Your reputation is intact. And yet… something feels slightly off. Opportunities seem narrower than they should. Your energy is uneven. You’re not stuck, but you’re not fully stretched either. The start of a new year often amplifies this feeling. Goals reset. Expectations rise. And the big question surfaces:
What do I do next? Strengthen… or rebrand?
These two moves are often confused. They are not the same — and choosing the wrong one can slow your momentum rather than accelerate it. Knowing the difference is a strategic skill.
Why “rebranding” is often the wrong first question. Rebranding sounds bold and proactive, but it is frequently misunderstood. It is not a response to restlessness. It is not about wanting something different.
True rebranding is needed only when there is a misalignment between how you are known and the value you are ready to deliver next. Many professionals skip the diagnostic step. They change titles or language without understanding whether the real issue is perception, utilization, or direction.
Tip: Before you rebrand, seek clarity. Most career missteps come from acting on assumptions rather than evidence.
Common assumptions include:
- “People don’t see my full value.”
- “I need to pivot to stay relevant.”
- “What made me successful before won’t work now.”
Some may be true. Many are incomplete. The real work is understanding what matters to you and what matters to the organization that hired you.
Strengthening vs. Rebranding
- Strengthening is about making your existing value clearer, broader, and more visible.
You may need strengthening if:
- You are respected but underutilized
- Your contributions are strong but narrowly defined
- You’re trusted, but not invited into bigger conversations
- Your role has grown, but others still see you through an older lens
In these cases, your reputation isn’t wrong — it’s incomplete.
What helps: Clarify what you want to be relied on for. Expand your contribution. Make your judgment visible. Align your work with where the organization is going. This is evolution, not reinvention.
- Rebranding becomes necessary when your current reputation limits your future direction.
You may need to rebrand if:
- Your reputation blocks new opportunities
- You are typecast in a way that no longer fits
- Your strengths are tied to a role that is disappearing
- You want to move into work your current brand cannot support
Rebranding requires letting go of parts of how you are known, helping others update their mental model of you, and creating new evidence of performance. This is structural, not cosmetic.
A personal note
In 2017, I began by strengthening — investing in my coaching skills. Two years later, after completing my Senior Practitioner diploma, I realized I needed to rebrand from HR/OD Consultant to Leadership Coach and author. It wasn’t a single leap. It was a sequence.
Closing Reflection
Not every career moment calls for reinvention. Not every plateau is a problem. The most effective professionals are not those who constantly rebrand — but those who know when to strengthen and when to shift.
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About the Author:
Steliana van de Rijt-Economu is a leadership (team) coach, global speaker, and author of the best-selling books “Parentship: A Leadership Guide for Families and Teams” and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. She is the founder of “Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders”, Linkedin community, a place dedicated to empowering working parents—especially women—to lead with purpose both at home and in the workplace
by mothersasleaders | Nov 26, 2025 | A mother's inner world of emotions and feelings
Turkey has become the centerpiece of Thanksgiving in the United States. After living here for four years, I still wonder why this bird was chosen to symbolize gratitude for the pilgrims’ survival. 
I grew up in Romania, in a small ethnic community with roots in Northern Greece. For us, the biggest Christian Orthodox celebration is Easter — and lamb is the meal of choice.
My son became intrigued by the “turkey tradition,” so he and my husband recorded a special Thanksgiving episode of their podcast Zero Gravity called Eating Turkey Over Thanksgiving. They each took a position and presented arguments for and against it. The result is an entertaining twenty-minute dialogue that mostly shows how much fun they have as a team.
Celebrations usually begin as tokens of group values and community identity. But when we stop sharing the story behind them and only focus on the easy, fast symbols that money can buy, “celebration” quietly turns into “tradition.” And tradition, without meaning, becomes habit.
That shift from meaning to habit is exactly why, in my research interviews forth the latest book Parentship in Families as Teams, I invited parents to pause and ask themselves:
• Why are we doing this event, activity, or party?
• Is it for us? For the kids? Or maybe for what the neighbors, school, or peers might think?
• Does it bring us joy or satisfaction? Or is it quietly draining the joy we’re trying to create?
So, I ask you, dear reader:
🌱 What’s one tradition you are ready to drop this year?
🌱 What’s one new ritual you’d love to start?
The holiday season can make the invisible load feel heavier — not just for mothers, but for fathers too. The “holiday magic maker” role often falls on one person, but the impact is felt by the whole team.
🎉 Celebration Tips from Chapter 14: Building Family Team Rituals That Matter
In Chapter 14 of Parentship, we explore how celebration and recognition rituals can transform family dynamics. Here are a few practical ways to bring that spirit into your home this season:
• Start a Gratitude Circle: Before meals, take turns thanking someone in the family for a recent contribution — from cooking dinner to helping with homework.
• Celebrate Effort, Not Just Outcomes: Acknowledge when someone tries something new or shows kindness, even if the result isn’t perfect.
• Design Your Own Rituals: Whether it’s Friday pizza night, a winter walk, or a shared playlist for decorating the tree — make it yours.
• Honor Transitions: Birthdays, graduations, or even the end of a tough week can be marked with a simple ritual of acknowledgment.
These rituals don’t need to be elaborate. What matters is that they’re intentional, shared, and rooted in your family’s values.
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About the Author:
Steliana van de Rijt-Economu is a leadership (team) coach, global speaker, and author of the best-selling books “Parentship: A Leadership Guide for Families and Teams” and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. She is the founder of “Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders”, Linkedin community, a place dedicated to empowering working parents—especially women—to lead with purpose both at home and in the workplace
by mothersasleaders | Sep 25, 2025 | A mother's inner world of emotions and feelings
For years, the leadership speech for women has been shaped by one idea: to be taken seriously, we must emulate the powerful male
archetype—assertive, outspoken, extraverted. I lived that story in my 20s and 30s—I wore serious pantsuits, looked people straight in the eye, used humor to defuse tension, just like men do. I thought they’ll listen. It worked. I climbed the corporate career ladder, earned respect, and built a career. But something shifted in my late 30s and 40s. Motherhood cracked open a new dimension in me—I started to question the value of achievement, material things, and speed over safety, long-term responsibility, and quiet determination.
Perhaps there is a difference between women as leaders and mothers as leaders.
And it’s time we name it.
Mothers tap into a unique pool of feminine intuition and wisdom that comes from the need to protect the vulnerable. They are not all “Mother Theresa” types, of course. Some are more like Queen Consort Catherine de Medici of France, who made three of her sons kings and ultimately sacrificed the family for royal longevity—strategic, visionary, and sometimes ruthless. Mother-leaders don’t need a throne or a title to shape the future and do the right thing—they act when the situation calls for it.
In recent years, diversity policies have encouraged the rise of women leaders who embody “yang” traits—bold, visible, and vocal. That’s progress. But let’s not overlook the quiet power of mother-leaders who get things done through others, who build trust, who listen deeply, and who lead with love. They are not Napoleons, conquering new lands. Mothers are gardeners of human potential.
I see them every day. Elena and Saule, my Toastmasters club colleagues, are shining examples. They “mothered” a Gavel public speaking club for children. Their impact is tremendous. They do more and talk less. They smile, guide, and empower. They even make us look good in pictures. That’s what mother-leaders do. They face sleepless nights, emotional storms, and the weight of responsibility—and still show up with grace. They are determined. They know that true leadership is not about being in charge, but about caring deeply and acting wisely.
So I ask you, dear reader:
🌱 Do you have examples of mother-leaders around you at work?
🌱 Who are they, and what impact do they have on the people around them?
🌱 Do you recognize the mother-leader traits in yourself?
Let’s expand our definition of leadership. It’s time to unveil the quiet, strategic, nurturing force that mother-leaders bring to the table.
Let’s make space for leaders who build legacies not through domination, but through devotion and commitment.
How can you embrace your inner mother-leader?
- 💖 Truly know yourself and truly love yourself—acknowledge your strengths, vulnerabilities, and biases.
- 🌍 Explore the universe around you, beyond your family—your ideas matter.
- 🌸 Blossom and share your ideas with enthusiasm—don’t wait for permission.
- 🤝 Help and receive help—leadership is not a solo act.
- 🌟 Believe in yourself—never use negative words about yourself. Don’t apologize for your influence. Your voice is powerful.
Leadership starts with you.
Invest in your happiness and your dreams. Whether you’re a mother by birth, by spirit, or by action, your leadership leaves a lasting imprint. Let’s recognize it.
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About the Author:
Steliana van de Rijt-Economu is a leadership (team) coach, global speaker, and author of the best-selling books “Parentship: A Leadership Guide for Families and Teams” and ‘Mothers as Leaders’. She is the founder of “Mothers as Leaders – learning across borders”, Linkedin community, a place dedicated to empowering working parents—especially women—to lead with purpose both at home and in the workplace
